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The Authentic Learner: Who are you?

Kris De Leon wrote in her article Learning to Trust Myself

Man Thinking“I am starting this blog to help people who are now asking the bigger questions in life – Who am I? Why am I here? What’s my purpose?

I often hear people talking about how important it is to be real and authentic. So how do you be authentic when you don’t even know who you are? I asked myself these questions several months ago. I tried very hard to be the upbeat, positive person that everyone seemed to like. Was that really me? Or was I trying to cover up some things about me that I knew people wouldn’t like? Was I just pretending to be someone else just so they’d like me?”

This made me think about what the authentic self is for each of us and what that means as a learner. Each of us learns in different ways depending on our background, our parents, our environment, and so much else. I looked at these questions on Be Authentic and Self-Empowerment and thought “why aren’t we using these same tools to determine who each learner is?”

Here’s a few questions I would look at using or adapting to determine who each child is and their authentic self:

  • Who am I? 
  • What is my story?
  • Am I ‘my story’?
  • What is my potential?
  • Where am I stuck?
  • What is my identity?
  • What are my fears?
  • What are my hopes and dreams?
  • What do you enjoy doing most?
  • What concerns do you have about your story now?
  • Is your story really your story or someone else’s?

Young children may not know how to answer these. Their parents may be directing what they need and want without being aware of it. There are other ways to determine how each child learns best: Multiple Intelligences, Universal Design Learning strategies, Learning Styles, etc. I’m not even sure who my authentic self is. I know I love to write and learn from others. I do know that I learn best by doing my own research, brainstorming with others, and taking a chance to try something new. What about you?

If each learner understands who they are and how they learn best, then they can help drive their learning with their teacher. The teacher shouldn’t be the hardest working person in the classroom. That’s what it is now. I coach teachers around the country and see how hard they work. Many teachers work too hard where students should be the ones working the hardest. Learning needs to be hard. Learning means you are learning something new that you don’t know yet. It means you are challenging yourself to reach out of your comfort zone. When you learn that something you didn’t know yet, it is rewarding and powerful.

So what if we spent more time in the early years working with parents and guardians to help students figure out who their authentic self is so they know their authentic learner?

About the author

Barbara Bray is a Story Weaver, empowerment coach, award-winning author, international keynote speaker and podcast host helping people turn life’s hardest chapters into their most meaningful work. As the creator of the Grow Your Why movement, she guides women, educators, and leaders to transform adversity into purpose, clarity, and momentum.

Her message isn’t theoretical; it’s lived. Barbara learned later in life that she survived childhood polio, a truth her parents kept secret so she would never see herself as a victim. That foundation of resilience carried her through multiple reinventions, including a career-ending injury and a lung cancer diagnosis that reshaped how she thinks about time, truth, and legacy.

For more than three decades, Barbara has worked at the intersection of storytelling and transformation, helping people reclaim their voice and direction. Through her books, podcast, and coaching, she challenges a common belief: resilience isn’t about bouncing back—it’s about growing forward, on purpose.