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Don’t Trust Your Ears! Head, Heart, and Hands Listening with Kymberly Dakin-Neal (EP178)

 
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Kymberly Dakin-Neal is a certified mindset coach, playback practitioner, and founder of Voice into Learning, LLC. Her specialty is team experience design, incorporating individual coaching programs and applied mediums such as improvisation, intentional listening, and focused creativity.

Her book, “Head Heart & Hands Listening in Coach Practice,†is an essential book for coaches, teachers, salespeople, parents, and, actually, anybody who listens for a living. Through Kym’s work and book, she demonstrates why listening is what the world needs more of. 

I met Kym at the International Listening Association Convention at the University of Maryland in August where we had a picture of us taken in the Listening Garden.

Your WHY 

As an introvert in an extroverted culture, I’ve always been curious about group dynamics and how listening is a strong, if underappreciated, superpower that introverts possess. They are often the ones who have valuable insights and ask powerful questions. Introverts often (not always) have highly refined listening skills.

Your Background and Overview

I do training based on my book, and I work with clients who are struggling with transitions, change, and interpersonal issues. I was a founding member of Portland Playback Theatre and won an international Audie award for book narration. I recorded audiobooks for the BBC, Brilliance Audio, and Audible. I taught at Bowdoin College, the University of Southern Maine, the University of New Hampshire, and the University of New England. I currently train physicians in productive listening and patient communication at Tufts/MaineHealth and Kaiser Permanente in the Washington, DC area.

Voice into Learning, LLC  

I do a fair amount of public speaking coaching, particularly with those who are transitioning into positions of greater visibility. Particularly for introverts, stepping into the spotlight can be challenging. As an introvert myself, I can help clients avoid the mental pitfalls of imposter syndrome and anxiety. The Positive Intelligence model is particularly effective in this kind of work.

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Your mind can be your best friend or worst enemy. Most negative emotions and stress come from self-sabotage. The Positive Intelligence PQ® program offers proven tools to strengthen mental resilience and quiet internal saboteurs. This leads to a more positive mindset, greater resilience, and reduced stress, known as mental fitness.

I cannot recommend Kymberly enough! Once regarded with dread, my upcoming talk to an audience of 2500 should be a breeze. Kymberly meets you where you are, not engaging in cookie-cutter solutions.
I feel that I have been equipped by a “magical helper†to embark upon my own Hero’s Journey. Five stars, at least!

~ Jonathan Fisher Writer & Director of PBS Documentary on NYC Probation “In a Whole New Wayâ€

The Training Game Shift/POV

I developed the training game Shift/POV: From Conflict to Collaboration in One Hour through the Top Gun incubator program and created a bookmarking app called Nugget to eliminate the need for note-taking in online meetings.

URL to video:
https://youtu.be/W2pU31j63_k?si=m_zq3hnDmiLd44VB

Bookmarking App “Nuggetâ€

During the shutdown, when all of my in-person work evaporated, I was facilitating online meetings and noticed challenges. Challenges of trying to get participants engaged while taking notes, or coursing through videos to highlight the important points I wanted to share. “Nugget†lets users highlight the important things in real-time at the touch of a button and allows them to share those notes with the team. We sold Nugget in 2023 for a nice price!

Why is deep listening at the core of coaching? How do we build trust?

Listening is how we grasp another person’s story and build bridges to our own. It’s how we create relationships and build trust across differences in skillset, experience, background, race, age and gender. Effective listening gives us information beyond the actual words – once we know how to slow ourselves down long enough to pay attention to it.

When we feel deeply heard, something in us relaxes enough to feel that we just might be able to trust this person. That is how trusting, positive relationships are built.

Book, “Head, Heart & Hands Listening in Coach Practiceâ€

My book, Head Heart & Hands Listening in Coach Practiceis an exploration of intentional listening as an essential skill for coaches. It introduces the Head, Heart, and Hands (3H) Listening model as a vital tool to amplify effective listening in coaching practice. This is essential reading for coaches in practice and in training, as well as organizational psychologists, HR professionals, salespeople, and those working within corporations.

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Head, Heart, and Hands Listening in Coach Practice is about how we listen, what we listen for, why it matters, and how to do it better. The 3H  model provided in these pages is quickly grasped, easily applied, and could transform your next important conversation.

If you are a coach, a counselor, a therapist, a salesperson, or a teacher, you’re in a listening profession. This book is designed for YOU.

“Head Heart & Hands Listening in Coach Practice,†published by Routledge Publishers, won a 2023 North American Book Award and is used at the Olympia Snowe Women’s Leadership Institute. 

Kym Dakin writes about listening, but more important are her listening skills. As a coach she listens, synthesizes and provides valuable feedback…often on the spot. I came away from my coaching sessions with her with clarity on issues that I’d been struggling with for a long time. I can highly recommend Kym as a coach if you are looking to sort things out and find a clear path forward in your life.

Sue Inches, Author, Educator, Environmental Advocate

What else would you like to share about the power of listening?

What do you pay attention to when listening? What do you often miss? I wrote my book and provide coaching support because I want to help others grasp primary and secondary listening tendencies and amplify the ones they need to expand their personal and professional effectiveness.

Just imagine a world driven by more curiosity, empathy, and understanding!

Kym’s Contact Information

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Website: https://kymdakin.com/ 
LinkedIn:
linkedin.com/in/kymdakin
X: @kymdakin

Substack:
https://kymdakin.substack.com
YouTube: www.youtube.com/@kymberlydakin-neal7760
Email: kdakin56@gmail.com

*****

I appreciate that Kymberly Dakin-Neal joined me on my virtual porch. I believe it was destiny to meet Kym at the International Listening Association Convention. When we walked around the Listening Garden, she shared some stories that resonated with me. As a coach and author, I realized we had a lot in common. I needed to follow up with her, read her book, share my book, and invite her to be a guest on my podcast. I hope you enjoyed our conversation as much as I did. Please share this post and podcast with your friends and make sure you connect with Kym.

*****

“Grow Your Why…One Story at a Time” includes 23 stories from inspirational educators, innovators, and entrepreneurs. Go to this page or click on the book to go to Why Press Publishing for launching, details, and resources.

I’m getting wonderful feedback on how much the information and stories in “Define Your Why” have helped them. For more information about this book, go to this page or click on the book for resources, questions, and links.

Make sure you check out more of the Grow Your WHY podcasts and each post that the guests created. Click on this link or the logo below to list by episode, alphabetical, or reflections.

I am a co-host of a new podcast, “Real Talk with Barbara and Nicole.” Check out the episodes about Authenticity in a Polarized Society around different topics. Click on RealTalkBN or the logo below.

About the author

Barbara Bray is a Story Weaver capturing stories from inspirational people about insightful journeys to discover and grow their purpose. As a Creative Learning Strategist, Speaker, Coach, Mentor, and Change Maker, she has worked tirelessly for over 30 years to transform teaching so learning is personal, authentic, and meaningful. Barbara is the owner/founder of Computer Strategies, LLC with its division Rethinking Learning and My eCoach that has a new home at K12Leaders. She was the past co-founder of Personalize Learning, LLC, and co-authored two books: Make Learning Personal and How to Personalize Learning. In 2017, Barbara started the Rethinking Learning Podcast and the #rethink_learning Twitter chat. From the stories her guests shared and her own journey, she wrote "Define Your WHY: Own your story so you live and learn on purpose." She co-hosts the podcast, "Real Talk with Barbara and Nicole" with Nicole Biscotti about authenticity in a polarized society. Barbara is the author of "Grow Your Why... One Story at a Time" with inspirational stories from 23 amazing contributing authors that she self-published under a new division and publishing company, Why Press Publishing.